Thursday, May 23, 2013
So far so good
So far AIT has been okay for me. I get to talk to Matt every night - even if it's just for a little, and we get to have small conversations throughout the day. He told me tonight that we will only be able to talk on weekends once his classes start. Obviously I'm no good at all when it comes to hiding my emotions because while I thought I looked normal, Matt told me to turn my frown upside down. At least I tried not to look sad. I wish this weren't the case; I wish his days would continue to end around 5, but now they go till early hours of the morning. It is a good thing that he's in classes though, so he won't be set back even farther while waiting to get placed in a class. I'm thankful that things are moving along. But, as he said - we will only be able to talk on the weekends. Now what scares me about this is that I work weekends, so I won't be able to talk to him as much as I want. I guess I have to go back to giving myself pep talks every night and missing him even more! I know I'll be fine, but I guess I just wasn't expecting this. That's the life though, I just have to suck it up. And I will. It sucks sometimes, yes - but Matt is way worth it. I don't think every fort is like this when it comes to AIT, so maybe others will get lucky when it comes to talking to their loved one. Another thing is that Matt shares a room with two other guys, so when we get the chance to FaceTime they are right there. Now this wouldn't be much of a problem except for the fact that when I see Matt my mind goes blank and all I can think about is how much I love him - so naturally all I want to say is "I love you" over and over and over. Then I think, I probably shouldn't do that because his roommates will think I'm some weirdo and Matt won't want to keep saying it back and forth. So then I end up just looking at him and smiling and thinking in my head how much I love him.. and it just struck me that that might be even weirder than saying it over and over again haha! I have one more week left until summer classes start, and one day left until I have to go back to work. The break was definitely nice! Starting school will be good for me. I'll keep busier, and the days and weeks, and eventually months will go by faster. That's all I really want... is for this next 4 or so months to go by as fast as possible! As I'm typing Matt sent me a message, and in the message were several pictures of me, and he and I with cats on our heads instead of our faces. I just cracked up, they are so hilarious! I always knew I wanted, and even needed to marry someone funny.. and I just feel so lucky to have him. We share the same humor, and he just makes my life fun - even from miles away. I suppose that's when you know you've found the right person - when you've been separated for months, but they can still make you the happiest person in the world. That's what Matt does for me! And I'm not exactly sure what I did to be blessed with him, but I wouldn't trade him for the world! I've known for a while, but so many more things keep proving to me that Matt is 100% perfect for me. Basically what I'm trying to explain is just how happy I am. Life is hard, but life is good.